


Ascend

by Elle_est_vivant



Category: Minecraft youtube, Real Person Fiction, X33n - Fandom, captainsparklez - Fandom
Genre: Conversation format, M/M, not really realistic but sort of realistic, slow progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-09-28
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:06:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26701894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elle_est_vivant/pseuds/Elle_est_vivant
Summary: Seventeen. High school boy Jordan, newly hired therapist X33N.Eighteen. College boy Jordan, still therapist X33N.Nineteen. Newbie YouTuber Jordan, still therapist X33N.Twenty one. Dropped-out-of-college Jordan, quitted his job X33N.Twenty four. Successful YouTuber Jordan, nowhere-to-be-found X33N.Twenty five. Missing-X33N Jordan, still nowhere to be found X33N..Twenty eight. Stupidly in love Jordan, and maybe X33N.
Relationships: Jordan Maron&X33N, Jordan Maron/X33n
Kudos: 9





	1. 17.1

‘ _Hello, this is the mental health hotline, I am therapist X33N, how may I help you, sir?’_

‘I… _sniffles_ … I failed my term exam in world history… I… Will any college still want me? Will I become a cashier and stay as a cashier my entire life? Will I end up on the streets? I don’t know I’m scared help… _coughs…_ I can’t do this anymore and now I’m suffocating because I’ve been crying…’

_‘You won’t. you’ll be just fine. Now, take a deep breath, follow me, inhale… 3…2…1… and exhale. Exhale the stress with it. Good, I can hear you, you’re doing great. Now again. 5…4…3…2…1…’_

‘…Th…thanks… but I don’t know… the test accounts for so much GPA and I basically failed the entire course…… It’s not my fault, it’s just the teacher doesn’t teach us anything and he expects me to just know it… I don’t… I… I’m just not good enough for it…’

_‘It’s not your fault, you know it, it’s okay. It’s okay to fail a course, it’s not everything, it’s okay. It’s even okay to not get into college.’_

_‘How should I address you, sir?’_

‘Jordan. Also please don’t call me sir, it feels weird…? I’m only seventeen.’

_‘Of course. Now Jordan, can you tell me about your day? Apart from that exam, did anything good happen? Anything fun? Anything exciting?’_

‘err… I aced that advanced math exam, and we had pizza in the cafeteria today, and… let me think… A cat meowed at me on my way home.’

_‘That’s great! See, of course colleges want you. When I was in high school I remember myself failing a lot of exams and advanced math was definitely one of the worst. Definitely. Actually, I’m still terrible at math to this day, and look, I’m not on the street, I’m a therapist.’_

_‘And that’s based on how math is even more applicable in life than history. Of course you’ll be okay, you’ll be more than okay, that exam is nothing in the grand scheme of things… are you a cat person?’_

‘I’m not a pet person in general. I know I can’t be responsible of taking care of pets. I can’t even take care of flowers. But that cat on my way home was really really cute.’

_*light chuckles* ‘I have a dog. I’ll soon have two dogs. It is a lot of care, but she really helps with my mood. But yeah, I understand you. You’ve got me though, Jordan, you can dial the central hotline and ask for X 3 3 N. That’s me. Or you can find new people to talk to every time, maybe you’ll meet someone really nice.’_

_‘We’re all here for you, Jordan. Everything will be okay.’_

‘ _sniffles_ I’ll stick with you I guess. I don’t want to have to explain the exam and the pet thing and everything all over again… wait you will remember me when I next call, right? You won’t forget me in a day or two?’

_‘I most definitely won’t. Jordan, has a terrible history teacher, acing math, doesn’t want pets, on his way back home there’s a really really cute cat. I will remember every single thing. It’s my job.’_

‘I thought your job is to, umm, make people feel better.’

_‘And you wish me to remember you. So I do just that.’_

‘…So you only care about me because you’re paid to do so.’

_‘I…’_

‘I’m sorry that’s a bit rude. I’m just not feeling particularly well as you know, so… didn’t think that through. Sorry.’

_‘No it’s all good. Actually, you’re right. But that doesn’t mean I don’t sincerely want you to feel well. You’re not important to me because you’re my client, you’re important to me because you simply are. All my clients are important to me because they simply are.’_

_‘Jordan, you don’t have to be the best in everything. You don’t even have to be good in everything. You just have to be you, alright? I can tell you from my life experiences, it doesn’t matter. All it matters is to be who you are and do your best. *Your* best. Not necessarily *the* best.’_

_‘But also I do think you’re the best. So it might overlap.’_

‘Thank you so much. I still have my English homework to do, so… _sniffles…_ Gotta hang up.’

_‘No problem. I hope you have a nice evening, and call me anytime. For anything. Even if you just want to stay silent or have someone listen to you talk and not respond. Anything.’_

‘Wait I forgot one last thing… what’s your name?’

_‘That’s one of the few things I can’t do for you. I’m not supposed to tell you about myself too much. Sorry.’_

‘I’ll just call you Xeen if you don’t tell me. I have to call you something after all. It can’t be “Mr. Therapist”, no. And also not “X three three N”. Xeen it is.’

_‘…sure.’_

‘Alright bye X33N. I really got to go.’

_‘Bye. Have a nice evening.’_

‘I want to meet your dog.’

_‘…Bye, Jordan.’_


	2. 17.2

‘X33N?’

_‘Hey Jordan it’s you again! How’s school?’_

‘Better.’

_‘That’s great! Did that world history class getting any… less bad?’_

‘I dropped down from AP to regular. So yeah but no. there’s nothing to learn in regular and although I’m getting straight As I still feel like no college would want me.’

_‘How so?’_

‘It’s literally elementary school things. If colleges know this is what I’m learning in high school they’d probably think me stupid.’

_‘First, you are not stupid, and that’s what actually matters. Second, they don’t know if you’re learning advanced stuff or elementary school stuff, they just know that you took history. Third… be proud of your advanced math. I’m telling you, you’ll see all sorts of people that suck at math later in life. More than you think.’_

‘X33N. Why do I feel like you would say things like ‘you’ll see all sorts of people that suck at history’ to other people and use me as an example.’

_‘I actually never did. And first of all, you don’t suck at history. You simply have a terrible teacher. Second, it’s okay to be bad at something, that was my point. Even if you are actually bad at history, it’s nothing.’_

‘But… I don’t know. I understand what you’re saying but… I just can’t accept that I’m not the best. I’m not even above average. It hurts.’

_‘Hey, it’s normal to feel that way. Let’s talk about other things, other related stuff. What do you want to do when you graduate?’_

‘I don’t know. But probably something fancy. I don’t have a plan for the future. Actually, I want to be a YouTuber, but I know it’s unrealistic.’

_‘I mean, it can be pretty realistic, right? What type of videos are you thinking about making?’_

‘I mean, I play Call of Duty pretty decently… and a bit of Minecraft, so… maybe?’

_‘Are you asking me? Of course I would say ‘go for it’! There’s no worst case scenario and the best case scenario is you’ll pop off and be absolutely famous and successful, right?’_

‘but I don’t know how to… talk in the videos. I don’t know how to talk to people in general. Believe it or not, I talk to you more than I talk with anyone around me. Well, maybe not as much as my mom and dad, but… you get my point.’

_‘I would still say go for it. Maybe even start now. Maybe you do know how to talk in videos but you simply aren’t aware of it because you haven’t tried. Maybe you think it sounds terrible but people actually like it. Go for it, Jordan.’_

‘X33N?’

_‘Yeah?’_

‘What did you plan to do when you were in high school?’

_‘I didn’t have a plan. I just went with what I felt like. I worked with computers for a while, then I went back to school and got my license in being a therapist, and I don’t feel like changing much of it right now so I’ll probably be a therapist for the foreseeable future. So you see, life doesn’t need to be planned out.’_

‘I know. I just… called you because I want to talk about stuff with someone, I’m doing alright today. Thanks for being here.’

_‘Of course, any time.’_

*short silence*

‘I wish you were actually someone I know. Like, maybe an older student that can give me life advices. I like talking to you but I don’t like the idea of only being able to say my anxieties out with someone I practically don’t know.’

_*chuckles*_

_‘I’m only twenty-four, so consider me a really old college student if you want to. I don’t mind as long as it helps you.’_

‘X33N? are we friends now?’

‘X33N?’

‘You think I sound like a middle school kid in his phase right now don’t you. I thought you were supposed to say yes to everything.’

_‘…and yet another proof of just how smart you are. But no, I think you’re a human with perfectly normal human emotions of having the need to talk to people, and although I’m not technically just supposed to say yes to everything… yes we are friends as long as you wish.’_

‘So we’re friends.’

_‘So we’re friends.’_


End file.
